Thursday, April 8, 2010

Talking with Author Elle Amour/Lise Fuller


Military Couples & Cybersex

A few weeks ago, I hosted a party on my publisher’s yahoo loop. On it, I had one of the gals interview my husband about military couples and cybersex. Now, as a military wife whose husband has been deployed, I have to say, times can get pretty lean, sexually speaking.

Thank God for the internet. Years ago, we didn’t have that luxury. Mail got crossed and a letter you’d written just a few days ago would be delivered the next week, yet one you wrote a few weeks ago, could be delivered three weeks after the second. This is particularly amusing (that’s the only word I can use in good company) when you are sending updates of family life or whatever. However, another difficulty is trying to be sexy for your man thousands of miles away.

For those of us in that situation, the internet in all its corrupted glory, has been a God-send. I mean, not only can you send emails, but on occasion, you can actually instant message each other. And, not to go into any detail, but those dang cameras can get pretty hot—if you’ve got one. Better than any porn I know for sure. Beyond all that, I’d hate to think that some military person is monitoring this stuff, ‘cause like my husband mentioned, all soldiers do this. They have to in order to stay sane. Well, and to prevent a case of blue balls. (Sorry, there’s no better way to put this.)

What’s funny, though, is some of the stories my husband has told, and some of the difficulties. Guys try to find a private place (as the at-home spouse, it’s a little easier for me and others), but that’s not often possible. Apparently the guys try to give each other as much privacy as they can, but when the need arises, they go for it. Thing is, some forget others can hear them as they often have headphones on and when they get in that erogenous zone, well, I’ll let your imagination take over here. (If you’re wondering, yes, my hubby was careful but a lot of the guys aren’t. And let’s face it, a lot of them are young and either aren’t thinking about it or are more like my husband and don’t give a you-know-what at the time. They are talking/interacting with their significant other, and that’s what’s important to them. It what reminds them of where they are and what they’re doing and why. And quite frankly, it talks to both partners of the sacrifices they make. And know that when a soldier goes to war, their family does sacrifice, too. It’s hard. And one of the hard parts is being a temporary single person. But the internet helps with that in a big way.)


Now, being a writer, it can be doubly interesting. You see, my husband also has other benefits. When he’s gone, I write a LOT of sex scenes. It’s my outlet for the lack of my husband being here. And guess who my first line editor is for these? You got it. It’s my husband. He loves reading this stuff when he’s gone (when he has the time). And I always sent them to him. The funniest part is he takes on the persona of my hero and his responses can be hilarious because he makes believe I’m the heroine. His latest is Rurik, my alien space hero—sexy, strong, and definitely virile. The one before that was Jake Colder, small town sheriff and ex-special forces. So you see, in this, we can still have fun together and enjoy each others company—even though we’re so physically far apart. (And I bet you didn’t realize the other fringe benefits the average romance novel had!)


So there you have it. Cyberspace and marital bliss.

Thank God.

Lise Fuller (also writing as Elle Amour)

Join me on twitter at www.twitter.com/lisefuller !

10 comments:

DawnsReadingNook said...

Hi Lise,

What a great blog article. I remember when SO and I started dating close to four years ago and he had a family function on the other end of the state. We spent the time text messaging and I left sexy messages in his email/voice mail as well while he was gone. Anything to keep the spark alive and flaming hot. :)

Thanks for sharing and being here today.

Lise Fuller said...

You're more than welcomed! I enjoy sharing my experience as a military wife with others. Life is interesting, to say the least.

Lise

Cait Miller said...

I have personal experience of this too, it's surprising how creative you can get! LOL

Shakespeares Sister said...

Lise,

This is so interesting. I'm trying to finish another manuscript right now, but my next project (hopefully) is a military romance, and I have no idea how anything works in that world, much less the "fun" part of things. :-) I may be hollering at you for help if you're available. Thanks for blogging about this topic--it's one I wondered about.

Shelby

Lynn LaFleur said...

Very informative post, Lise. Thanks for sharing so much of your private life with us. It's inspiring!

Lynn

J Hali Steele said...

What a great blog! LOL, how great is it to have your husband as a 'critter'?!

K.C. Sehlhorst said...

It's actually why and how I started writing. Had to get rid of some of that pent up sexual frustration during a deployment. :D. Having been on both sides of that fence (army wife and soldier)it's never easy. When they have access to the internet it does help.

Nina Pierce said...

I was there for the chat and now for the blog ... and you and your husband crack me up that you're so willing to share. I love it! I have no doubt this is going to show up in a storyline somewhere. On a more serious note, thanks to you and hubster, Lise for the sacrifices you're making for our country.

Lise Fuller said...

Oh, man! Go away for a few hours...

Shelby, feel free to email me at lise@lisefuller.com or elle@elleamour.com. And if it's something I don't know, I'll ask hubby. He's really good about this stuff.

And thanks everyone for posting. I love you all and anything you need, let me know! You're all wonderful!

Lise
www.lisefuller.com
www.ellemaour.com

Anonymous said...

I know what you are talking about. Been there, done that. (ex-soldier and military spouse)

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